These hormones are making me suicidal... I just had to give my husband my bottle of sleeping pills so that I wouldn't take all of them like the voices are telling me to... I don't know how much more of this I can take... I feel like I'm wasting our time... Haters rejoice... Fuckn rejoice y'all... I'm sick of living like this... I'm sick of being a burden on my husband and our family... I'm sick of the dissapointment and sadness I'm being made to feel... And made to make others feel... Is it really all worth it... I can't stand the uncertainty of all this fucking ttc shit... We spend all this money for what... Nothing... But heart break and dissapointment... Just like I've been for what seems like forever... It's just all rediculous... I how can I bring life into the world if I can't even handle and even appreciate the one I have... I feel like such a waste of time and energy... I have no motivation anymore even to get out of bed most days... How the fuck am I going to raise a child... I'm such a bitch and I'm so mean to people and it's all these fucking hormones I'm on... And even just have naturally... I was such a nice person when I was on resparidone... But it made me gain 90 pounds and it elevated my lactation levels so much that I leeked milk everywhere... I was miserable but at least I was a nice person... Now I'm the type of person I'd like to tell to go fuck themselves... I just want the pain to end and to not be a burdan on my husband anymore...
So I'm cheating so sue me 😂🤣😂
No not on my husband 😂🤣😂! We've decided that diet and exercise arn't enough to help me get rid of this fat on me... And beings that I'm 36 and we're trying to start a family, we don't have all the time in the world to wait for me to lose this belly fat so that I can actually work out more then just taking walks on the beach at Jones beach and me riding my stationary bike my husband bought me... Not to mention I feel like I've been on every diet imaginable and the only one I've ever had any sort of success with is Atkins... But diets aren't everything especially when the whole reason I gained 90 lbs in the first place was cause the VA put me on resparidone back in 2012 after I admitted myself after the X husband broke up with me... My husband met me on that ward and I weighed 170 or so lbs back then and was basically platued at that weight til they put me on the resparidone like I said... 90 lbs y'all I looked like a marshmallow... And pretty muc
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